How do we limit our options?

This post is primarily about how mediators may unintentionally fail to assist parties explore all the options for potential resolution. But this question–how do we unintentionally limit our options in conflict?–is helpful for anyone facing disagreement. And to provide basic context for the following, in facilitative mediation the mediator is generally focused on facilitating the parties’ own exploration and narrowing down of party-generated options for resolution. In contrast, in evaluative mediation the mediator often proposes their own solutions and will tell parties why their position in the conflict may be weak or strong.

The article “Reimagining the Mediator’s Settlement Proposal” by Theo Cheng and Harold Coleman, Jr., in the July/August 2025 issue of Dispute Resolution Journal got me thinking about how mediators and parties to a dispute may unintentionally limit the options for seeking and reaching resolution. For example, a mediator may so strongly favor the purely facilitative model of mediation that they fail to even consider offering the “mediator settlement proposal” mentioned in the article as an impasse-breaking option to the parties. The facilitative purist might watch parties circle the same three options for hours rather than suggest a fourth approach that could break the stalemate. On the other hand, a mediator may be so entrenched in the evaluative model of mediation that the parties become quickly anchored to proposals that may not be as well-tailored to their interests as options that would have emerged through a more facilitative model.

Ultimately, the mediator’s obligation is to conduct the mediation based on party self-determination through every stage–including mediator selection, process design, participation, and outcomes. Mediators can support this with periodic process check-ins and explicit discussion of available approaches. Parties too, can remain alert to artificial constraints by asking questions like: “Are there options we haven’t considered?” or “What would need to change for that proposal to work?”